The History of "Michael"

I have many nick-names. All my friends call me 'Kenneth', and all my family calls me 'Michael'. My aunt affectionatly calls me 'Baby Mike.' My dad calls me 'Big Guy,' despite the fact I was a scrawny little runt when I was a kid. But he get's and 'E' for effort.

When I was in Kindergarden thru 2nd Grade, I was called Mike by all my friends.

It was a cool name, it rhymed with bike, which made for some even better nick-names. Mike the Bike was a good one I recall.

Michael was going strong in my younger life.

But in 3rd grade the impossible happened. I happened to have the distinct honor of being in a classroom with 4 other "Michaels." With me, that made 5 total. Can you imagine the horror. It was like my individuality went down the tubes. Mike the Bike didn't apply to just me!!!

So the teacher had a very ingenious idea (to her anyways). Instead of having 5 Michaels, she would have none, and refer to us by our "other" names. In my case it was Kenneth. My name being Kenneth Michael Garza, Jr. for all those that are staring at this post all confused and dreary eyed.

For the other Michaels this was not a big deal, because everyone could say "Michael" a certain way and each "Michael" would know who they were referring to. But, for me, this happened to be the first year I attended this particular school. So nobody knew me as Mike the Bike, or just plain Michael.

Everyone started to get to know me as Kenneth... and the rest is history. I could never go back to Mike the Bike. At this point it would just be lame. So now everyone knew me by "Ketchup Kenneth."

... I know it's not as cool as Mike the Bike, but it's really hard to work with Kenneth.

Now, lets be very clear about this. It's not Ken, or Kenny, but Kenneth. Why is that important??? Well, it's not, I just like Kenneth better.

A little side note, I recall a very interesting coincident. In the seat next to me was a girl that was crying. Her name was April. Yes... her birthday was in April if I recall, her parents were very original. But I digress. She was crying because this was her first day in that school as well. And she was upset that she didn't know anyone. Well it turns out that I recognized her from my Kindergarden class. And I told her that she shouldn't cry because I remembered her from Kindergarden. Well, being the skinny little runt that I was, she was less than enthused. But she eventually came around and finally started to feel better. Which was nice.

Now, finally to the reasoning behind this post. I have a guestbook on my family's website (www.garzagazette.com) and my Aunt Annie very lovingly put a little note on there about how she could never do the Kenneth name. So with that in mind. I dedicate this post to her.

By the way, no one but my brother and I call her Annie, everyone else just calls her Anne.

We love ya!!!

-Kenneth 'Mike the Bike'